Guaranteed Diet Plan!
I was in Wal-Mart yesterday buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow for my Dog and was in the line to check out. A Woman behind me ask if I had a Dog........Duh!
I was feeling a bit crabby, so on impulse, I told Her no, I was starting the "Purina Diet" again, although I probably shouldn't because I had ended up in the Hospital the last time I tried it. But to my delight, I had lost 50 pounds before I awakened in the intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my Orifices and IV's in both arms.
By now Her eyes were Bugging out of Her Head.
I went on and on with this bogus Diet Story and She was totally buying it. I told Her it was an
easy, inexpensive Diet and that the way it works is to load your pockets or purse with Purina Nuggets
and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The package said the food was nutritionally complete, so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now totally enthralled with my Story, particularly the tall Guy behind Her.
Horrified, she ask if something in the Dog Food had poisoned me and was that why I had ended up in the Hospital.
I said no....I'd been sitting in the street licking my Butt when a Car hit me. I thought the tall Guy was going to have to be carried out the door. |
